In response: prevention

In response to an opinion piece in the UVA student paper, The Cavalier Daily, I wrote a letter to the editor that is published in today's paper along side an excellent letter from the women who is the director of the Sexual Assault Education Office where I interned and who got me interested in sexual violence prevention. The title is not mine but interesting to me that they assumed that it what I was saying. It is also shorter than the full letter I wrote - so I will paste that here so you can see the entire argument I laid out.


What is "prevention"

In Prashanth Parameswaran's column "Meaningful prevention" (Nov. 8), he states "anyone who approaches the issue of sexual assault from the lens of "preventative" measures risks being labeled a chauvinist who blames predominantly male crimes on females." I approach the issue of sexual assault from the lens of prevention and I wanted to share some ideas about prevention from my perspective.

Parameswaran outlines some "prevention" strategies and says "what preventative measures really call for is women taking a greater role in preventing assaults from occurring in the first place." This is a old view of "prevention" that was put forth partly as part of efforts to empower women to be in control of their own sexuality.

Safety tips have merit. The problem is not just the issue that they lead to victim blaming. The perpetrator is left out of the picture and is not held accountable. Women everyday order their lives around precautions to avoid men's sexual violence and harassment. Women are very aware of safety tips - just ask women around you what they do to prevent sexual violence or what they think about before they go out to a party. Women can follow every safety tip and still be assaulted. Or maybe, a woman will not drink, stay with her friends, and go home alone and she is fine. Instead someone else gets raped. Safety tips do not reduce the overall number of sexual assault.

Another problem with this notion of "prevention" is to ask what really counts as prevention. Other safety tips include take self defense, carry mace, have a cell phone, etc. I may know self-defense and have my mace out - but if a male attempts to attack me, even if I fight him off - this is intervention, defense -- not prevention. Prevention would mean that a male would not attempt to sexually assault a woman in the first place.

Maybe safety tips are the best we can do for now until long term changes in male behavior changes, but I am tired of safety tips and more emergency phones being enough for now.

Think of how useful this column could have been if it had focused on men and charged men -and women- with examining their ideas about sex and appropriate behavior, encouraged men to make other men accountable. You could have demanded change, demanded that people unite against sexual violence, and say men's violence against women will no longer be accepted. Promoting safety tips is easy. And it helps us women feel safer in a world where if we recognized many of the common situations of men's sexual violence against women, women might never leave their houses. How can we walk around in the world, go to parties, have a drink, let our guard down, and trust people if we are always suspicious of every male around us.

Saying safety tips need more value is letting men off the hook for their behavior - even if you have a disclaimer saying men are responsible. Most men are not sexually violent - but many of the men who are would not consider their behavior a problem. And when other men excuse or condone men's sexually violent attitudes and behaviors, those perpetrators may feel even more entitled. At the very least, they will not feel challenged to re-consider their actions ("I know what this girl wants, she is drinking because she wants to loosen up, she is just saying no to play hard to get or because she doesn't what me to think she is easy, she was flirting with me all night, etc")

We all have to make ourselves accountable to each other. And in my ideal prevention world, I would also like to explore how healthy sexuality education could be used as a form of prevention. Instead of telling people what is wrong and bad, how can we imagine positive messages about respect and communication -- so that sex would not be associated with power and control and using sex for violence would not be tolerated or considered.

If you haven't seen them before, I encourage you to check out websites like www.acalltomen.com or mencanstoprape.org and the numerous links you can find from their pages.



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There have been several news and opinion pieces about sexual assault in the student paper - it seems like there has been at least one a week. Here is a quote from another opinion column that I found problematic: "As long as lenient attitudes towards premarital sexual activity coexist with alcohol consumption, there will be instances where the line between rape and consensual intercourse is unclear." Though I do have several responses for this sentace, I will only say that for a person who has experienced sexual violence, the line is clear - there might be doubt or self-blame or lack of memory, especially if alcohol was involved, and a survivor might not be able to put the experience into words or ever say those words, but it happened and it is not a survivor's fault.